On The Other Hand

Recently someone came up to me exclaiming "You're left handed!" I hadn't heard this for ages and for some reason it started me thinking about this aspect of my persona that, frankly, I have never really considered. I don't notice if others are right or left handed to the extent that I was told that two of my three sons are lefties, but I don't know which ones.

For centuries, afflicted souls like me have been subjected to prejudice that continues even today. Most cultures employ negative words to describe us, suggesting characteristics including stupidity, dishonesty, awkwardness, bad luck and even evil.

The Latin for 'right' is DEXTER – dexterous being a positive attribute – Latin for 'left' is SINISTER, derived from the word Sinus meaning a pocket that was located on the left side of one's toga – a garment worn by men in ancient Rome, but over the years the meaning altered to imply menace.

In French 'right' is DROIT meaning straight or correct, whereas `left` is GAUCHE meaning awkward. The German for 'right' is RECHT, and 'left' is LINK being a liar. Hungarian for 'right` is JOBB, meaning better and 'left' is BAL meaning bad. In English to call someone your 'right hand man' is a compliment, but to say he has 'two left feet' is an insult. This list is endless with negative connotations in Spanish, Dutch, Welsh, Turkish, Sanskrit, Irish, Chinese and more…

As recent as the 1960s many lefties were physically forced to use their right hand and reports state how teachers would smack a student's left hand, often with a ruler. Another incident was a boy being hit on the head with a dictionary – his teacher believing that the boy was linked to Satan.

This pressure on children to conform frequently led to the development of speech disorders such as stuttering and dyslexia. This process is still followed in Taiwan where a 2007 study showed that 59.3% of all left handed children are still being forced to convert. In China, not unexpectedly, there are no left-handers whatsoever. Everyone there must conform.

However, a high percentage of Lefties excel in close contact sports such as boxing and fencing, but as the distance between players increases, the percentage drops. Incidentally, the one sport where I admit to a definite killer instinct is Scrabble, which I suppose just possibly might be considered as a close contact 'sport'……

Today, organizations for left-handers proliferate. There is a Secret Society of left handers - "One day we shall rule the world," says their internet site. A Left-Hander Liberation Society – and more…. I could never join any of these groups as I am not a joiner, never having felt the need to associate with like-minded devotees. I guess I agree with Groucho Marx who once famously declared "I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member".

The same goes for Annual Left Handers Day, celebrated each August 13th. Unfortunately, I will miss it since I have other pressing engagements for that date ad infinitum.

Not so, however, the lady who advertised recently in the paper for a partner.
"Left handed Jewish lesbian gardener seeks similar to share in life's surprises." What can one say except perhaps to fall back on the old northern adage – "There's now't so queer as folks"!

The only time I remember being smacked with a ruler was when I was aged 8 at Hebrew class, but I think this was probably due to my lack of attention rather than any digital considerations.

Even today we lefties are discriminated against, particularly when it comes to using a wide range of implements such as scissors, computer input devices, knives, cameras, many musical instruments and sports goods.

It makes me wonder how my 10% of the population manage to survive and I haven't even begun to venture into the hazardous world of weapons, power tools and circular saws, almost all manufactured to suit right-handers. Even university desks are prejudiced against us.

However just as I was beginning to feel slightly disadvantaged, I discovered that one or two cultures take the opposite view – the Incas, (which doesn't help much today) Buddhism and Judaism. In the Bible it says that the right hand is the hand of strength (Exodus15:6). In Genesis it states that it is valued as being the dominant arm, but there is not one negative comment about lefties. Quite the reverse – Ehud, a judge and famed soldier (also a leftie) told of the 700 left handed tribesmen of Benjamin, who could sling at a hair's breadth and not miss'. (First Chronicles 12:2) Ehud is credited with the deliverance of the Jews from the Moabite King Elgin, whom he assassinated by thrusting a knife into him with his left hand – a tale that is rather too graphically described for my taste, in Judges 220:28.

True there is the Biblical injunction – "If I forget thee O Jerusalem, let my right hand lose its cunning", but this is regarded as a reflection of the fact that 90% of the population were right handed, rather than any derogation of the left hand.

There are, however, certain advantages to being a `leftie'. Our brains are wired differently – we use the right side, which apparently extends our range of talents. We can multi-task with ease and we have the ability to see under water much better than right-handers. I have yet to discover how this latter characteristic can improve my quality of life.

We are also more likely to end up as creative geniuses. Four of the original designers of the Mac computer were left-handed as were four of the Apollo astronauts. Impressive, but something that has always been outside my immediate career plans.

We also, apparently, excel in music and maths. Here I can claim only a 50% success rate. Four years ago I passed my singing exam at the Guildhall School of Music, with a Distinction and Honors. However when I took my maths exam aged 16 and even after extra tuition, I only managed 11%.

What is more satisfying for me is to find myself part of a gifted group excelling in creativity and intellect, following in the illustrious footsteps of Julius Caesar, Aristotle, Leonardo da Vinci, Joan of Arc, Toulouse Lautrec, Charlie Chaplin, Robert de Niro, Winston Churchill, Albert Einstein, Bill Gates, Barack Obama and, best of all, Paul McCartney.

For obvious reasons I have excluded certain lefties such as Jack the Ripper from the list featuring a selection of well known 'aggressive' lefties including Napoleon Bonaparte, Alexander the Great and tennis player John McEnroe. Researchers conclude that this characteristic predominates amongst lefties in 'violent societies' – however I fail to understand why Wimbledon Tennis should be described this way.

Another fact is that since January 20 1981 most of the presidents of the United States have been left handed with the exception of George W Bush, Jo Biden and Donald Trump. Make of this what you will…….

To determine whether lefties were more likely to pursue creative careers than righties, the Left-Handers' Club, a group dedicated to left-handed research and product development, surveyed more than 2,000 left-handed, right-handed, and ambidextrous participants. They discovered that Lefties tended to be drawn to careers in the arts, music, sports, and information technology.
So on reflection I guess I am true to form – certainly regarding art and music, less so with sport and as for information technology or indeed anything technical I am absolutely useless…. so be it……